Group Agreements
These are the shared agreements that keep GMEM a safe, confidential, and supportive space.
Confidentiality
Protecting privacy is essential. A support group creates a safe space where you can feel comfortable talking about personal emotions and experiences that you might not talk about in other situations. Never talk about what goes on in the group in a way that would identify a member of the group without that person's permission.
Attendance
Each member makes a commitment to attend meetings regularly and to be on time. Regular attendance generates trust. Showing up means you are showing support. If you have to miss a meeting, it is important that you notify Paul and/or the group in advance.
Cohesion
When a member joins or departs, there is a period of adjustment. It may take several meetings for a new member to feel trusting and vulnerable. Conversely, it may take several meetings for ongoing members to adjust to the new group dynamic. Regular attendance is important for this process to take place successfully.
Communication
Each meeting starts with a check-in, which sets the tone and topics for the meeting. During the rest of the meeting, using "I" statements is encouraged. Try not to use generalizations or conclusions you assume to be true for everyone. For example, instead of saying: "It's a relief to tell your parents you're gay," an "I" statement would be "I feel relieved I told my parents I'm gay."
Support is …
Support in this context is both social and emotional. The main components of support are understanding, empathy and concern. Support can be as simple as silently bearing witness to another person's words and state of being, just as they are right now. Engaging in this way takes conscious effort.
Support is not …
Support is not judging or making negative criticism. Support is not giving advice or trying to "fix" another person. However, being supportive does not mean you can't respectfully disagree, challenge or question.